By-proxy Identity Theft

By-proxy is not my reality and the false reality it is should not be forced on anyone.  Some  of the worst,  most damaging, thus most criminal  identity theft attempts are  by-proxy efforts.  Talk about unreasonable facsimiles, not to mention an overabundance of misplaced and missing items frequently used and always ready in the same place.

What type of abominable scoundrels imagine they have the right to try to compromise someone else's life in that way for their own self-serving greed and delusions of grandeur associated with "owning" of other people in that way?  Worst are the efforts to justify with religion, what are extremely noxious and thinly-veiled identity theft efforts . . . too often from family and their enablers - people who are supposed to care or may have cared at one time.

Who would believe they can live someone else's life better and attempt to do so without consent and supposedly without knowledge of the target?  Actually, and too often otherwise seemingly good decent people.  It is no one's right to do enslaving by-proxy impostering; no one's right to try to assume the identity of another; no parents' right to own and enslave a child in that way for profit or punishment or desire for grandchildren or to acquire a son of daughter in-law of their choosing which their own child is not compatible with thus would not consider marrying; or any other excuse of an ill-conceived reason the criminally inclined would want to commit such crimes.

The crimes, attacks, and over-all damage done through by-proxy impersonation efforts are astounding - the attributed unacceptable attitudes, behaviors, personality traits, are all a form of character defamation and assassination.  Claimed child-birth, marriages, that result in a face and body in the mirror not of one's own making are ill-intended efforts to eliminate all the good changes people have chosen to make in themselves without harm or cost to others.

By-proxy efforts are enemy declarations the intent of which is to compromise the health and life of the target.   By-proxy identity theft efforts are not only a sin those who want to claim a religious right commit, but they are also a serious identity theft crime and should be prosecuted as such.

The Power of Kindness

Kindness has a much deeper effect and is much more powerful than we often realize. 

Consider the "Dark Tetrad" of narcissistic, sociopathic, machievellian, sadistic attitudes and behaviors - borderline or full blown personality disorder.  It is known to manifest in individuals but also on a large scale it manifests in nations.  World history is full of examples - as is the present.  I will refer to those who target others with any or all componentes of this tetrad, as "abusers".

Effects from the Dark Tetrad, as a whole or in any combination,  are damaging and life threatening in a variety of ways,  not the least of which is intended to motivate self-harm, no matter what or who is the cause of these shadowy dark night of the soul visitors manifesting in anyone's life.  Whether the cause is a person or it is on a national scale, if self-harm is not the response, then the abuse escalates to sadistic harm, be that physical, emotional, mental, psychological, spiritual - individually or in combination - as long as an abuser believes or knows accountability for behavior will not be compulsory, nor crimes prosecuted should it become known the created problems have escalated to the  level of recognized crimes.

 I will not address how abusers become abusers, nor how they acquire and make use of enablers, nor our forgiveness of them motivated by our compassion, nor when there is seemingly a cessation of abuse, then a second unexpected "era" of more vicious adult-style abuse - the type of abuse which includes abusers expanding their sphere of abuse to others in our lives, all of which, again, requires forgiveness of the same abuser and additional enablers.  Nor will I address that subsequent forgiveness is for one's own benefit not that of the abusers and their enablers.  Suffice it to say that by the time some finish K-12  the equivalent of an undergrad  psychology degree has been earned  based on objective "field study" without having studied psychology.  Eventually, when we are  able to successfully understand and deprogram ourselves as the subject of our own objective field work, it is equivalent to grad work.  Kindness is the key in all this work, to others as well as ourselves, as is what makes kindness possible.

I will address kindness.  When an individual decides to work at having the strength to accept the personal challenge of living "normally", even seemingly happily within a limiting abusive environment from which it is not possible to absent oneself, there has to be a motivator.  And to activate motivation there also has to be a genuine love and appreciation of others in the form of universal love - a love of that divine spark of life that is in each one of us.  Such genuine caring and compassion eventually brings with  it authentic deep self-knowledge and appreciation, as well.

The experience of universal love lost because of circumstances beyond one's own control often becomes universal love found, once again, because of another. When we accept that gift as responsible adults no matter what age (I was 12), it remains throughout life.  If we experienced that when very young we may be fortunate enough to experience it again when we are of legal age and have more recognized control over our own lives. Perhaps some experience it many more times in life, as needed.  Our good fortune is that after the reality of the abundance of universal love is once again reactivated, experiencing kindness reminds us that universal love is the inheritance of us all, thus it becomes the absolute best reason for always extending kindness - giving as much as we are able within the limits of our own circumstances.

We have no idea the personal challenges people have met in the past and must meet on a daily basis, even those we imagine we know well, those closest to us, and family.  We never know unless they tell us, themselves.  Many choose to navigate their difficulties with a grace that is only possible  through the  manifestation of universal love in their lives, regardless of whatever other trustworthy loving relationships might also be part of their lives.

The more we are reminded through the kindness of others that universal love is present to uplift us all, even in the most dire of circumstances, the more we are able to contribute to manifesting and  holding it in the present moment - for all - especially when others also do the same. 

Extending kindness and experiencing kindness reminds us that at our best we are all one as part of universal love, that even in times when life is most difficult for us,  we contribute to improving the lives of others and ourselves  through wanting to extend the generosity of kindness.

Kindness is one of the best and most productive habits of attitude and behavior we can choose to cultivate - a real superpower accessible to everyone.

The Bee

Bumblebee pollinating orange flower

Today, during Ramadan 1439, as I am refreshed and encouraged while musing upon "the bee" (surah xvi al-nahl/النحلة), I have renewed my understanding of why some are disconcerted about the mythological nature of many passages in sacred scripture (of all religions).  As adults we have learned the value of verifiable reason. As such we recognize that passages in sacred scriptures are not necessarily verifiable sources of detailed history.  So can these narratives about experiencing events be considered folktales and myths? 

I suggest labeling them as such should not necessarily be understood as being offensive. There is a foundation of actual historic fact underlying myths and stories passed down through time, whether or not they convey enough verifiable fact for us to justifiably recognize them as being actual history. What we can experience, instead, are the "stories" revealed to us about historic events for their value as object lessons, passed on to us as the lessons learned  by the original narrator - whomever it may have been - even though these renditions do not fulfill our desire for verifiable history. I suggest that as such, they are interpretations. 

When we encounter these narratives in sacred religious texts we considered them to be divinely inspired interpretations of known prophets, or of unknown prophets whose names may be lost in the fog of deep time but whose wisdom has not been lost.  However, interpretations of sacred scriptures do not limit deeper and additional insightful understanding of believers. And while the interpretations of clergy and learned religious academics are also of high value, neither do those interpretations limit deeper and additional insightful personal understanding.  The revealing of further insight and understanding is the nature of, a characteristic of, and a gift associated with the personal faith of a believer.  Regardless of the beliefs to which any one of of us is drawn, to know what we believe and why is the key to our own understanding, though not necessarily the key to understanding the beliefs of others.

Perhaps it is built into human nature, because we care, that we may doubt the faith of others and want "proof" of their faith which we are able to recognize in the same way we are accustomed to wanting proof from children about their understanding of everything.  However, at issue to each one of us, as adults, is not the faith of others, which many are tempted to doubt when other people do not express faith in ways we want to expect they should express it.  At personal issue is the viability of one's own faith - the maintenance of which is reaffirming and insightful as it guides and brings joy to our lives.

Everyone has faith in something - no matter one's religion or lack thereof, though it is not always expressed, by anyone, as best it can be in all that is said and done.  Myself, I do not expect people to believe exactly as I do even within the framework of  similarly expressed beliefs.   But I also do not suffer fools gladly who want to harass me and worse try to convert me because of what I personally believe, especially when I know I have not shared these thoughts with them.

As for me, whatever anyone's point of reference may be for choosing to step onto the path of living a life of faith as a believer, God willing, I recognize when the divinely inspired sincere faith of other folks is a personal experience much much larger and deeper in breadth and depth than only oneself . . . and other people.